When Dan and I were dating, there was a loooooong period of time when we saw each other once a week at most. Between when we got engaged and when we got married (you know, that whole 4.5 months) we managed to be in the same state about three times, one of which was the visit when we planned all the major aspects of our wedding, and once when we took care of details, like getting our marriage license. Back then, it was bearable, because we were enduring the separation for a greater end, so that we could get married and be together always.
Right now, I am sittng in my couch writing for the blog at 9 p.m. on a Friday night, because Dan has been in San Diego on business for a week, and althought he was supposed to be home two hours ago, his flight has gotten all messed up, and right now he's in Phoenix. At best, he'll be back at midnight. At worst, sometime tomorrow.
It's an interesting fact of marriage that this kind of distance bothers me much more than it did when we were dating, and when we were dating, I thought I would die if the distance continued. I thought that being married and being together so much more than we were dating would mean that whenever we had to be apart, it wouldn't bother me so much. But it's not true. I've spent this whole week alone, and I'll admit that the first night or two was nice. I caught up on some reading, made some phone calls to friends I had been meaning to make, and went to bed early. What I haven't done is see Dan or talk to Dan very much except for those awful five minute conversations you have when you're apart. It's surprising. When we were dating, we talked on the phone a lot, and it seemed like a good enough way to stay close at the time. But now, it's not enough. I am not a needy person. I have lived alone. I don't need 15 people around me to feel OK. I would often rather stay home and watch TV than go out and party. And yet, after a week without Dan, I have realized that I am getting weird. Turned into myself. Lonely.
Dan will be home some time in the next 24 hours, and everything will be fine. But I've discovered something this week: the longer I'm married, and the more the relationship between my husband and I grows, the more I see that we're truly not meant to be alone.
I'm glad I'm not.
« When you say nothing at all. Or not. | Main | Aw, look at the cute little deers mommy! ... BAM! »
The long-distance thing
Search
About
This page contains a single entry from the blog posted on February 18, 2005 8:49 PM.
The previous post in this blog was When you say nothing at all. Or not..
The next post in this blog is Aw, look at the cute little deers mommy! ... BAM!.
Many more can be found on the main index page or by looking through the archives.
Powered by
Movable Type 3.35
Movable Type 3.35
Comments (9)
Awwwhhh!!!!!
Posted by Mom | February 20, 2005 11:20 AM
Posted on February 20, 2005 11:20
Yeah, I thought I would gross everyone out while I waited. Dan, by the way, got in at 1:30 in the morning.
Posted by Haley | February 20, 2005 3:09 PM
Posted on February 20, 2005 15:09
I remember rolling my eyes when Amy (Howerter) Rathjen moaned about separated from Craig for TWO WHOLE NIGHTS when he was on a business trip. I couldn't figure out why it was such a big deal considering she had been without him her whole life up until that point.
Silly me. I know better know [says the old married lady].
Glad Dan is home.
Posted by Becca | February 21, 2005 10:33 AM
Posted on February 21, 2005 10:33
Oops. That second "know" should be "now." Darn Post button!
Posted by Becca | February 21, 2005 10:34 AM
Posted on February 21, 2005 10:34
I was glad he was home, too. Except he LEFT AGAIN. He's gone to Georgia this time. Left this morning, back on Thursday. I shouldn't be bitter, because it could be worse. He could be military, or a truck driver, or something that requires way more travel than this. And he usually doesn't travel this much. But, still, even if I am a whiner, I am not happy about this. Yuck.
Posted by Haley | February 21, 2005 2:42 PM
Posted on February 21, 2005 14:42
Aww... that's so sweet. Who knew you'd turn out to be a big cheeseball? haha...I'm sorry Dan's gone again. If you are lonely and want to talk you know I'd love to hear from you!
Posted by Hannah | February 21, 2005 6:54 PM
Posted on February 21, 2005 18:54
I'm usually the one traveling in our relationship. I just got back last night from my most recent trip, and I just couldn't BEAR being apart. I totally know what you're talking about. I just feel irritable the whole time I'm gone. And desperate on the phone (so unsatisfying). Unless I'm totally busy the whole time, I wander around feeling empty and aimless. Sleeping alone sucks.
Posted by Jeannette | February 22, 2005 5:48 PM
Posted on February 22, 2005 17:48
Amen to that. I'm actually OK falling asleep, but then I wake up in the middle of the night and have this 30-second delay where I wonder why Dan got up and left in the middle of the night. It's not fun. I'm kind of glad I'm really really busy this week, because it's making the time pass more quickly. One more day!
Posted by Haley | February 23, 2005 8:50 AM
Posted on February 23, 2005 08:50
as their VP of Sales � Marketing. They currently tramadol live in Gig Harbor. They busiest time is during carisoprodol late October, November and December. The company cialis hires 400 temporary employees and does most of ultram it�s annual sales during the last quarter of the soma year. This year, we will hire hundreds of manufacturing viagra staff during the last few months of the year. Every paxil
Posted by tramadol | March 3, 2005 11:28 PM
Posted on March 3, 2005 23:28